Interesting dream last night...

I'm a food addict.  I know this.  I overeat when I'm happy, sad, stressed, anxious, the day ends with a 'y' - any excuse will do. 
I always thought me going on a "diet" or "healthy eating plan" was like telling an alcoholic "don't drink alcohol, but you have to drink beer every day." 
Except now.
I feel the physical part is covered - 5 shakes a day. 
I now have to work on the emotional/mental part.  That was a tough cookie to crack.
I think I've hit a turning point. 
I had a dream that I was eating a slice of pepperoni pizza.  First thing I thought was "Oh no - I've broke ketosis!".  So, I was eating pizza, and I realized it wasn't fabulous.  So, I threw out the rest of the slice, and said to myself "This isn't very good.  I don't need to finish this."
In real life, I wouldn't have done that in the past.  I would have blown it and given up.
Does this mean I'm changing my mindset?
I think so...

244.6 - another 3 lbs

I'm up to a total of 18.8 loss.  I'm pretty sure it would have been more, but I had to change my weigh in from Tues AM to Thurs PM due to work.  That's okay - it's still a loss, and I'm getting there!

It's been a rough week, comparatively speaking to the rest of my time on Optifast.  I feel it was due to the new job, and the boys' first day at preschool, but I've been hungry, and loosing steam.  I feel next week will be better, and more motivation to stay on track.

BTW, the boys did GREAT at preschool.  I was the one who cried when I dropped them off, and then on and off for the next 2 hours.  Yes, I'm that mom.  ;-)

All right, I'm off to the last day of my first full week at the new job.  Yay!

Little things I've noticed in the past 4 weeks

Yesterday was the official end of 4th week/beginning of 5th week on Optifast.  I normally weight in on Tuesdays, but I had to change my official weigh in day to Thursday due to my new job.  (yay new job!)
I know it's stress related, but I've really been craving food for the past week.  I'm not hungry - I just want to eat food.  That is what got me into this mess in the first place!
Is it truly stress related, though?  Or, is it the fact that I've had the same flavors of food for the past 4 weeks.  Could be both.

Here are some things I've realized/noticed since starting Optifast

1)  Distraction works wonders. 

2)  Staying hydrated really makes a difference in my hunger level/weight loss

3)  Homemade no sodium chicken broth is a perfect way to get a little savory yumminess into your day - and helps with fluid intake!

4)  I NEED to find ways to deal with stress when I'm in a stressful situation.  Like a new job.  Which I have.  Now. 

5)  When I get hungry, that is my weakest time and when I want to cheat.  You can put a plate of nachos in front of me when I'm not hungry and I'm fine.  If I'm hungry and you put spam in front of me, I'm going to want it like a filet mignon. 

I've also seen some physical changes in me that are pretty darn cool -

6)  My 1 pair of pants - that were getting tight on me 4 weeks ago - now need to be tailored.  I wore them on Monday, and spent the entire day pulling them up.  :-)

7)  I had to go to the middle set of hooks on my bras.  Now, this may not seem like a big deal, but they were actually getting too big on me.  I've never, ever gone to the middle set of hooks. 

8)  My new pants that I bought 1 week ago that were a little tight now are much more comfortable this week.  In 1 WEEK!! 

On an entirely different note, but will fall under the "stress" category - my babies start preschool today.  They'll be fine, I'm sure, but I'm a flippin mess.  I made sure their first day was a day that I was out of work, so if they needed me I could run down and get them.  Hover mom?  Yup!

Okay, I'll let you know tomorrow about my 4th week weigh in!

Hungry, Hungry, Hungry........

So, I'm in the middle of week 4, and I'm starving.  I'm so hungry, in fact, that I had trouble falling asleep last night.  I'm not sure if this is common for week 4, or if it has to do with the extra stress I am under this week.  I started a new job on Monday, and left a job I've been at for 6 years on Friday.  I struggled at the beginning of the week wanting to eat as many nachos as I could fit in a wheel barrel.  How many nachos did I eat?  None.  Not a one. 
Friday, my last day at work, my co-workers were sweet and got me an Edible Arrangements.  Once again, I didn't eat any.  I had my 5 shakes and my water.  Last night, as I was sitting there with my stomach growling, I didn't know what to do.  Water wasn't cutting it - my stomach wanted a steak.  Eventually I was able to fall asleep after about an hour and a half. 
I haven't been this hungry since week 1.
Today is a new day - lets hope I don't have to white knuckle it today!

Week 3 weigh in - 247.6 - total loss: 15.8 lbs!

I was soooo happy with my week 3 weigh in! 

This is farther than I've ever gotten with Weight Watchers, South Beach Diet, or anything else I've tried. 

It has been a pretty stressful few days, and I didn't realize just HOW MUCH I use food when I'm stressed. 

On Monday, I started my new job.  By 2 pm, I wanted to eat everything in sight.   Was I hungry?  Nope - I was just stressed.  I just wanted cheese and nachos.  Lots and lots and lots of cheese and nachos. 

So, what did I eat?  Nothing.  Nothing at all.  Was I satisfied?  No.  Not at all. 
I realized I have no other tools to deal with my stress.  So, I went home, changed into my sweats, sat on the bed with my kids and just felt miserable. 

Today, it happened again - I had so many forms to fill out for hospital privileges - all the same information but slightly different.  I wanted to eat.  Did I eat?  Nope. 
I did, however, just get up and walk away for a minute or two - just to de-stress.

I really have to find some good coping skills.

Almost done with week 2 (this should have posted on 3/10 - ooops!!)

I weigh in tomorrow.  I did really well this week, and yesterday I felt really, really good.  I actually had to remind myself to drink my shake (that has never happened.  ever.).  I thought I was getting sick, or the time change, or something. 
I'm finding I want to eat out of habit, and not necessarily because I'm hungry.  800 calories and about 100 oz of water apparently does the trick on keeping me full!

I have a schedule

when I get up - 16 oz tea
9:30 - 1st shake
12:30 - 2nd shake
3:30 - 3rd shake
6 pm - soup
9 pm - last shake.

I bought a 20 oz water bottle, and I drink at least 2 of them a day, along with a 20 oz lifewater.  and sometimes (like tonight) no sodium broth I made myself. 

Today, I'm up to 92 oz of fluid. 

I'm buying stock in toilet paper. 

Tomorrow will be my weigh in.  I'm sure it will be fine, because I didn't cheat.  I stayed on the plan.
I wanted to cheat.  I had a couple of stressful moments, that I just wanted to devour a pizza, but I didn't.  I really, really wanted to.

I was talking to my boss today, and I was explaining every other time I lost weight, it felt like an elastic band.  The more weight I lost, the more the elastic band stretched, just wanting to jolt me back to my original weight.  It doesn't feel like that this time.  I'm not sure if it's the ketones, or what.  But, I'm hopeful it's going to work.

See you tomorrow!

Week 2 - 251.6 - down 11.8 lbs!

Sorry!  I thought I already posted this - apparently not (haha)!

So, week 2 I stepped on the scale (on 3/11) and down another 3 lbs.  I'll take it!

At the end of week 2, I was doing better.  Very little dizziness, but I wanted to eat.  I realized it wasn't because I was hungry, I just remember what things taste like and I wanted to taste them. 
What did I do?  I distracted myself, and drank water. 
What did I want to do?  Eat pizza. 
But, I didn't.
Go me!

People are starting to notice the weight loss.  I had one co-worker ask if I was okay, because he noticed the weight loss.  I told him "Absolutely!" and  - on to tell him about the program. 

I'm finding I've been getting hungry and watching the clock 45 minutes before my next shake is due.  I just drink water, and try to distract myself. 

Some people distract themselves with fun things, like going for a walk, knitting, reading a book, etc.  I don't have time for that - I work and have 2 preschoolers. 
When I'm working, I figure out how many more patients I need to see before I can eat.
It doesn't seem to happen too much at home - I guess because I'm running around with the kids.

I'm still trying to get my footing with this program, and at this point I felt comfortable eating with people other than my family.

First, I took my kids to lunch at Corner Street Bakery (for those who don't know what that is, it's very similar to Panera Bread).  I ordered for the kids, got myself a caffeine free diet coke (which, btw, tasted horrible and I couldn't finish it.) and we sat down and they ate and I drank my shake.  It was nice to eat in a public place and feel comfortable drinking the shake.  The boys loved it (what 3 year old DOESN'T like PB &J?) and I felt it was a hurdle I was able to jump.

I felt like I could move on to the next step - eating with adults.  Later on last week, I had lunch with some co-workers.  Usually, due to our scheduling, I would eat alone.  I was fine with that - I had my water bottle and kindle, found a comfy place and relaxed.  Now, I was with 2 other people a the table - who were eating real food - and I sat there with my hot tea.  It wasn't awkward at all - I was surprised!  I think because I wasn't hungry, I wasn't tempted. 

Last but not least, I exercised for the first time today.  Only 20 minutes on the treadmill, but I didn't want to start out too much all at once.  I felt fine - kept my HR in the 120s - 130s.  I felt like my HR went up more running with the boys at the playground today - but that's just an added bonus, I guess!

Week 2 done....check
Eating at a restaurant....check
Eating with other adults.....check
exercised.....check

Oh, and by my home scale today (4 days after my official weight in) I'm down to 247.4 - 16.2 lbs down. 
Just sayin.

254.6 - Week 1 - down 8.8 lbs!

I survived the first week of Optifast!

Day 5 - Much better!  Took the kids out mini golfing, and brought a shake with me. Felt good.

Day 6 - Feeling great!  I feel so good, I wonder just how carb sensitive I am, seeing I feel so good off of carbs.  I also wonder how many calories I need, because I'm doing great on 800, and I know I was eating many, many more calories a day before this.
I actually missed a shake, so I doubled up in the evening.  I had a strawberry chocolate shake, and it was delicious!

Day 7 - Worked.  I was very calm today.  Calmer than I have been.  Is it the lack of carbs?  The weight loss?  The ketosis?  I'm not sure, but I like it.

Day 8 - Today - weigh in made me happy.  I expect a very small loss next week, but I decent one the week after that.  There is a woman in my group that lost 24 lbs in 4 wks.  I wouldn't even know what to do with myself with that type of a weight loss!  I find myself excited to see the weight come off, and just be a smaller person. 
I'm so proud of myself today - it's my birthday and my husband still bought a cake for he and the kids to enjoy.  I didn't have any.  Not a single. solitary. crumb.  :-)

This week, towards the end of the week, I'm going to start exercising.  No more than 30 minutes on the treadmill. 

Yay!