254.6 - Week 1 - down 8.8 lbs!

I survived the first week of Optifast!

Day 5 - Much better!  Took the kids out mini golfing, and brought a shake with me. Felt good.

Day 6 - Feeling great!  I feel so good, I wonder just how carb sensitive I am, seeing I feel so good off of carbs.  I also wonder how many calories I need, because I'm doing great on 800, and I know I was eating many, many more calories a day before this.
I actually missed a shake, so I doubled up in the evening.  I had a strawberry chocolate shake, and it was delicious!

Day 7 - Worked.  I was very calm today.  Calmer than I have been.  Is it the lack of carbs?  The weight loss?  The ketosis?  I'm not sure, but I like it.

Day 8 - Today - weigh in made me happy.  I expect a very small loss next week, but I decent one the week after that.  There is a woman in my group that lost 24 lbs in 4 wks.  I wouldn't even know what to do with myself with that type of a weight loss!  I find myself excited to see the weight come off, and just be a smaller person. 
I'm so proud of myself today - it's my birthday and my husband still bought a cake for he and the kids to enjoy.  I didn't have any.  Not a single. solitary. crumb.  :-)

This week, towards the end of the week, I'm going to start exercising.  No more than 30 minutes on the treadmill. 

Yay!

Days 1-4 - a review of Optifast Full Fast

I meant to do 4 individual posts, but this is the first time I could actually sit down at my computer.  Here are the first 4 days -

Day 1 - Lets just shock the system!  I ended up eating food for breakfast - kind of a "requiem for a meal",  and then went to my appointment at 10 am and started at that point.  I had 3 shakes that day.  I was ravenously hungry, and completely white knuckled it in the evening.  Ended up going to bed early so I didn't have to deal with the hunger.   Hunger scale - 10/10 (I wanted to eat my own arm-type hungry)

Day 2 - A bit shaky (no pun intended!!  Okay, maybe a little pun intended.). I was afraid I would have woken up in the middle of the night starving, but I didn't.  I even woke up because my son needed an emergency monster truck fix ("Mommy, I need my Spiderman truck!!") at 3:30 am.  I was able to go right back to sleep.  I was hungry, but not like day 1.  I pretty much drank and peed all day.  I was counting the seconds to my next shake.  I'm glad I didn't work.  I did have to go into my own business, but by 6 pm I just couldn't function.  I was tired, freezing and thirsty.  I went to bed at 9.  Hunger level - 8/10

Day 3 - I had to work today - 10 hours.  I made sure I had all my fluids and shakes with me, and I told my boss what I was doing, so if I had to make frequent bathroom breaks, and stop every few hours for a shake, she knew what was going on.  I was really tired by the end of the day.  I also had to stay 45 minutes later than expected, which threw off my shake schedule.  I ended up getting extra hungry, and inhaled my soup for supper.  I then got a headache because I was so hungry, and went to bed early again after taking some ibuprofen and snapping at my mom for calling me up to tell me what she had for supper (so sorry, Mom!!)
I got a call during the day from the nutritionist just checking in on me.  I was so glad she called!  I had a ton of questions to ask her.  I found out I can have low sodium broth, which is great, to cut the sweetness of the shakes.  It made me feel more secure.   Hunger Level -7/10

Day 4 - I had to work today, but I was going to breakfast with my mom first.  Proper planning was the trick here.  I had to drop the kids off at their morning class first, I was tired in the morning, but nothing unbearable.  I mixed my shake right before I left in my new Oster personal blender, grabbed a straw and I was on my way!  I did end up being late to the class, but they're 3 - I'm sure it won't effect graduation ;-).  I brought my mom to a local coffee shop, and I had a large tea with Sweet N Low, and she had a coffee.  It was really nice, and I drank my shake and my tea.  I then went to work, and I had a slow day because I had time to do paperwork.  Just what  needed - a day where I wasn't killing myself seeing 24 patients in 5 hours.  I was able to stop and have my shakes when I needed it, and drink plenty of water.  I really started to feel good this afternoon, so much so that I didn't start feeling hungry until 3:10, and I had my shake at 3:30.  Then, when I got home, I wasn't hungry for my soup - but I had it anyway.  I added some pepper to my chicken soup, and it tasted much better.  I was dreading having to eat that straight again!  Hunger level - 4/10.

I was told that the first 5 days are the worst.  I'm so happy I'm at the end of day 4!  I'm going to remember this, because if I break the fast, and I have to go through this again, I may just jump off a bridge!

263.6 - time to pull out the big guns

It's been over a year since I posted, mainly because I was just maintaining.  Not really trying, not really NOT trying, just staying the same.
Then I started a new job, and the pounds started packing on - and staying a while.
I left that job after only a few months, but left with an extra 5 lbs over my pre-pregnancy weight.  Now, I know what you're saying "So what - 5 lbs - boo hoo!"  But to me, that was the number I always felt like - as long as I was under my pre pregnancy weight, I'd be okay.  I wasn't under there anymore.  It was not okay.
I felt like those stupid 5 lbs actually made my knees hurt. 
My clothes don't fit.
5. Stupid. Pounds.

So....I completely pulled out the big guns and I started Optifast today.  It's a all liquid diet - medically supervised - through one of our local hospitals.  There were 3 options - 1)  a 1200 calorie diet of healthy foods, 2) 3 shakes a day, and 1 meal, or 3)  5 shakes a day. 
I chose 5 shakes a day.
Go big or go home, right?

Well, it's my first day and I'm white knuckling it right now.  I have 1 more shake to drink, but I'm trying to hold off so I don't wake up at 2 am starving.

I'm going to do this as long as I can - as long as I can stand it. 

I'm told it gets easier.

I hope so

257 - The Little Engine That Could...

That's how I feel today.  I'm just chugging along - drinking my water, measuring my food, weighing my chicken.  I'm moving as much as I can, while finding that balance between work/home life/self. 

Didn't quite make that goal - nail polish still sitting on my desk.  Maybe next week...

258.0 - Just Sayin...

I'm sore.  Well, maybe sore isn't the right word.  I feel intense burning and pain every time I straighten my legs - in my hamstrings, my glutes, and my hips.  So much so it would wake me up from a sound sleep last night.  Ibuprofen is my BFF right now. I'm not complaining, I'm just sayin.  And while I'm just sayin, I'm just hobblin, too. 

I came across an interesting facebook page the other day called "How to loose 100+ pounds".  Apparently this woman was 278 lbs at the beginning of her journey, and through exercise and calorie cutting, she lost 100 lbs.  "Good for her!" I thought.  She posts inspirational quotes and pictures about 15 times a day on her site - those feel good-type motivational quotes.  She also has a book which I downloaded.  She suggested making a main goal, and breaking it down further and further until you have daily goals.

Here's my breakdown:

WITHIN 1 YEAR OF 7/5/12 (my official 're-start date'): loose 60 lbs
QUARTERLY - the 5th of October, January, March, July: loose 15 lbs.
MONTHLY - loose 5 lbs.
WEEKLY - loose 1.25 lbs.

60 lbs seems like a lot, but when it's broken down, it's much more manageable.

Weekly, I'm going to add different goals, too.  This week, I'm going to exercise at least 3 times, and I'm going to have at least 2 water bottles full of water.


She also recommended I have another goal besides just the number on the scale. I've decided my goal is going to be to do a sprint triathalon by the end of next summer.  I have to add that into my goal setting, too, so:

WITHIN 1 YEAR OF 7/5/12 (my official 're-start date'): loose 60 lbs and have chosen a sprint Tri.

QUARTERLY - the 5th of October, January, March, July: loose 15 lbs. - This quarter, I will look into local Sprint Tris going on in the area this summer to see which ones I 'd like to do next summer.
MONTHLY - loose 5 lbs. - This month, I will work on increasing my cardio by doing different exercises
WEEKLY - loose 1.25 lbs.  - this week, I will exercise at least 3 times.

The last thing she mentioned was making sure you have rewards in place.  Lets add those to the list, too:

WITHIN 1 YEAR OF 7/5/12 (my official 're-start date'): loose 60 lbs and have chosen a sprint Tri. My reward will be a wonderful trip somewhere - site TBD.

QUARTERLY - the 5th of October, January, March, July: loose 15 lbs. - This quarter, I will look into local Sprint Tris going on in the area this summer to see which ones I 'd like to do next summer.  My reward for accomplishing these goals this quarter will be a new outfit.

MONTHLY - loose 5 lbs. - This month, I will work on increasing my cardio by doing different exercises.  My reward will be a pedicure - and when I hit 10 lbs I will get a massage.

WEEKLY - loose 1.25 lbs.  - this week, I will exercise at least 3 times. My reward will be a Pinkberry Frozen Yogurt.  (I know, I shouldn't use food as a reward, but I have twins - it's really hard to schedule things without them with just a week's notice!)


 I weighed in today - I'm going to keep my Sunday morning weigh-ins, even though I re-started on Thursday. 
I also did my measurements today - not pretty, to say the least.

Well, I'm almost half way there to my 5 lb monthly goal, and I already have my nail polish out for an upcoming pedicure. It's on my desk, next to my computer, just waiting to be used.  Just sayin.

Skewed estimation-o-meter

Yesterday was a good day. I tracked everything, and ended up using all my points by lunch.  Ouch!  Well, I see why it's important to keep measuring and tracking.  What I thought was 5 points of peanut butter ended up being 11 points.  No wonder I gained back my weight!  So, after lunch I took a walk with the boys to the library - something I love doing, but seeing it about 110 degrees with 362% humidity, it wasn't the best idea.  Nevertheless, I did walk 2 miles (round trip to the library) pushing the boys and believe you me, I made sure to track that!

I find if I plan something into the day, like exercise, I'm more apt to actually follow through.  My boys have been sleeping in, and I figured I would go first thing in the morning before they even woke up and be back right at breakfast time. This was going to be great - I'd get in a 30 minute walk on the treadmill and feel good about it. I slip out of the house, leaving my sleeping husband to watch the sleeping babies,  I get to the YMCA at 7:45.  I see there is a class called "Interval Training" at 8 am - it's a class that alternates step and weights.  "Oh please," I thought " no problem!  I just hope I get enough of a work out with this class."  Yeah...I overestimated my fitness level.  Just because I used to do 2-3 spin classes a week doesn't mean I'm still at that level apparently, because about 3 minutes into the warm up I wanted to send up a flare and wave my white flag.  60 minutes of this - really??!?!  Holy Guacamole!! Yes, I realized quite quickly I would have no problem getting in an adequate work out. On an intensity level of 1 - 10, my treadmill work out would have been about a 5 (when I thought it was closer to an 8) and the class was hovering around a 45.

Like so many of us, I realized I underestimate the amount of points/calories in food, and overestimate the level of difficulty in the exercises I do.  

It was a heck of a work out, but I know this was the hardest day.  Next week it will be easier.   And hopefully next time I won't need an 1 1/2 hour nap!

And this is why I call it a "rollercoaster"....260.4

After a little hiatus, I'm back - 7 lbs heavier.
To be fair, I'm pretty sure I gained those 7 lbs in 2 days - just 'cause that's how I roll. 
I feel like it takes me moving heaven and earth to loose 5 lbs, which I can gain back after a really yummy meal at Outback.

I'm feeling more and more like myself as the days go by....I can now think of my dad without bursting out crying (although I do shed a few tears now and then).  I know I'm nowhere near normal (well, to be fair, I don't think I was ever "normal"), but let's just say I'm closer to fine.

So, today marks the 2 month mark until Dave goes back to school, and I thought this was a perfect re-starting off point.

I wanted to start from the beginning with the reasons I'm on this journey --

"What are the reasons I want to loose weight?"

1)  Now that the boys are getting older, I find myself sitting on the floor playing with them more (blocks, cars, etc).  I want to be able to get up and down from sitting on the floor easier - without having to use a crane.

2)  I want the boys to see me eating well and exercising.

3)  I know I'm at a higher risk of developing diabetes, since I had it during pregnancy.  I want to avoid that.

4)  I counsel over 85% of my patients a day on their weight and why it's important to loose weight.  Spending that much time talking to people about the importance of a normal BMI is sinking in.

5)  I want to delay developing arthritis, which is reeking havoc on my mom's hips, knees and back.

6)  I want to stop having back discomfort - started from lifting a patient, exacerbated by my twin pregnancy, and continues b/c I'm a Fatty McButterpants. 

7)  It would be nice to be active and afterwards not have body aches and walk like an 80 year old Parkinson's disease patient with a prosthetic leg.

8)  I'd like to motivate my husband, Dave, into eating healthier and loosing weight, too, to help his diabetes.  I want to keep him around for as long as possible.

I think these are 8 good reasons to keep me motivated for a little while.

I'm off to re-visit my Weight Watchers account and see what I'm going to have for breakfast. 

Here we go again......WEEEeeeeeeee!!